I recently shared a major uptick on the roller coaster ride of our move to Germany. Of course, the highs certainly outweigh the lows and I choose to focus on the positives; however, the roller coaster must come down and take some loops with my head banging against the constraints.
Today, I want to share my fears for our move to Germany. I hope in a few months when I look back at this list, I’ll laugh at myself that I was afraid of XYZ and everything is not as bad as I thought! That’s my goal!
We won’t be able to find an apartment.
We went on a house hunting trip and only saw one apartment! It was really nice, brand new and a 5 minute bus ride from the downtown area. We submitted an application….or so we thought. We found out last week that we didn’t get the apartment because our agent went on vacation for 3 weeks and didn’t submit our application! (Huge positive that we will have 3 weeks of vacation!!!) I am NOT looking forward to living in a hotel for weeks and I fear that we won’t be able to find a place to live in the right location, the right place and the right amenities/safety/everything! At least it’s probably easier to find a place once we’re there, but I just want to it to be nice so we have a great home base.
I won’t be able to find a job.
I am lucky enough to have a flexible position currently, but I have yet to find a full-time (or part-time for that matter) position in Germany. I want to continue my career, obvi, and want to make sure this experience is valuable for me, as well. I hope to expand my writing, too. Hubby is making enough money to support us from a day-to-day perspective, but of course it will “help” to have 2 incomes, so we can travel and continue to save for a house upon our return to the US of A.
Learning the language will suck.
German is tough!! It’s going to be hard to communicate with anyone at a restaurant, at work, at the hotel, everywhere, until we learn the language. I took Spanish in high school, Italian in college and have done some Rosetta Stone in Italian. I am no where near fluent or even proficient in any other language except English. Never in my wildest dreams did I think German would be my first, second language, if that makes sense.
We won’t make any friends.
We are lucky that we have a few friends living in Germany already who we really like and who we could call up for dinner/trips/watching the dog/hanging out/etc. I am nervous that we won’t make any other connections and that we’ll be home every night staring at each other. While I love spending time with Hubby, I hope I make friends with a group of girls who will want to go shopping or get a mani/pedi.
I’ll miss home…too much.
I know for a fact that I will miss home, miss my family, miss my friends, miss English as the first language. I hope I won’t miss home so much that I’ll want to abandon this whole thing and come home after 6 months.
I won’t adapt.
I’m pretty set in my ways. I love going to the gym in the morning, cooking dinner when I get home, taking Copley for a walk, etc. I know I’ll continue all these things but probably a little differently. I feat that I won’t adapt to the lack of peanut butter available. I fear that I won’t adapt to the culture of no sarcasm….this is a legit fear as my sense of humor is 100% sarcastic. I fear I won’t adapt to always making a dinner reservation or to having to travel really far to visit an English speaking doctor. I fear Copley won’t adapt to being a dog who is seen and not heard. Basically, I fear I won’t fit in and everyone will know I’m American from a mile down the road.
I fear terrorism.
I fear this in Michigan, too, but I fear that the proximity to ISIS and the 0.5% of refugees who are part of ISIS is a concern.
BUT, I WILL NOT LIVE IN FEAR!
Of course, I am afraid of all these things but I refuse to let them hinder this experience. I will not sit at home because I’m afraid someone with a gun will shoot the movie theater or cook at home because I won’t be able to order at a restaurant. A lot of these fears are easily solvable. We will find a place to live, we will learn the language and we will adapt. But at this very moment, there’s so much happening that these fears are taking over my thoughts. There will be a transitional period and all of these fears will rear their hateful heads again, but we will get through it…right?
What scares you? Are these fears valid?
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